And Now For Something Completely Racist...

In the chapter covering research materials, in my Speech textbook, there is a list of reference works for quotations. When reading the following, look for the pattern:

1. My Soul Looks Back, 'Less I Forget: A Collection of Quotations by People of Color.
2. Ancient Echoes: Native Americans Words of Wisdom
3. Fire in Our Souls: Quotations of Wisdom and Inspiration by Latino Americans

Now folks, waaaaaaaiiiit fooooooor iiiiiit!

4. A Treasury of Jewish Quotations

When I read this, a fine mist of Diet Squirt issued from my mouth. What you've all witnessed is, hopefully, a gaffe. But it's still damn funny.

Relating this to a friend of mine, Rob, he mentioned his dismay that no Asian quote book was listed. Would you want them to, following this display? What would they have listed?

I've got a few:

5. Wok on the Wild Side: Famous Asian Quotations
5. A Short Collection of Asian Quotes
5. Confucius Say: And So Do Other Famous Asians


P.S. I tried to shore this up with Caucasian quote books, but none of them had that "punch" I was looking for, c'est la vie.

Hillary Clinton's Alcohol and Barbiturate Fueled Rampage

I think I know why the news in this country panders to the lowest common denominator. It’s quite simple; the lowest common denominator is eating it up. The lowest common denominator is patronizing the sponsors of the pandering stations. The lowest common denominator is the largest segment of our population.

Sensationalist humbug, as intriguing as it may be, chews up our news slots. Next time you watch the news, try this little experiment: Replace every instance of “Barack Obama” or “Hillary Clinton” with “Lindsay Lohan” or “Britney Spears” and vice versa. Notice anything weird? The weird thing is: It doesn’t sound weird at all. The same kind of coverage applies for both. Where were they last seen? What were they doing? Are they getting into trouble? If so, what is their response?

“Barack Obama and Hillary Clinton took a break from their campaign to vote on an Iraq appropriations bill in the Senate today, before resuming their campaign (cue video of the two hugging, exchanging pleasantries).”

Who cares (idiots, Dude)? I think the real news would go a little something like this: “The Senate voted on an Iraq appropriations bill today, a bill whose major provisions include [insert provisions]. The debate centered on whether or not the following provisions, [list certain provisions], had a place in a bill of this nature. Senator [name] felt [insert opinion] due to [reasons].”

Something like that.

Political news is going to jump the shark soon: When Barack Obama accidently flashes his snatch while climbing out of his limo at the premier for the new Tom Clancy movie.

Gross.